That's a hard thing to do... I don't know that I've ever been good at it myself. ... If anything, I've had to learn that sometimes pain is a good thing, because it means growth--even if I hate it.

It might be easier, for the time being to try to distract them from the pain. Until they've had some time and it's not so fresh. Doing the things that they enjoy--racing, playing games, stunts... they both really enjoy those sorts of things. I think the closer you become, and if you're willing to share your own feelings and pain first--the more likely they'll be to open up.